Friday, May 31, 2013


Love Poem

I hate all these new movies

I hate the sameness of the new theaters

I hate the cold seats in the poor old theaters

I hate seeing the young kids waiting in line for the film I just hated

I hate the parents that let these kids see films that hate

I hate you, I know I do

I hate the big parking lots

I hate the ticket stubs that mean nothing afterwards

I hate having to talk about these films

I hate not being able to talk about these films

I hate that paradox

I hate films that have great opening credits and nothing more, nothing more

I hate going into a film and coming out seeing that it snowed on the earth while I was away

I hate the fact movies no longer tell stories

I hate that everyone but me wants to be a movie star

I hate the idea that I am a movie star and you just don’t know it

I hate the people that don’t watch closing credits

I hate the punk who comes in too early to clean the aisles

I hate everyone who comes too late

I hate anyone who is in my seat — 8 rows up, center

I hate anyone who is in my other seat — backrow, center

I hate anyone in any of my other seats

I hate tubs of popcorn; think of it, tubs!

I hate balcony seats that are closed

I hate lit EXIT signs and miss old wall clocks

I hate smug couples

I hate fat farts

I hate parents who won’t let their kids run

I hate people who stand up behind me

I hate the guy who snuck up and criticized us for a film we took our son to then ran away

I hate cowards

I hate I didn’t get a good look at him

I hate the fact it happened while I watched the closing credits


Bob Arnold
from something forthcoming

 The audience with the film "Gaslight",  Grauman's Chinese Theatre


Luster said...


I hate that the small towns all closed their theaters and now even their movie rental joints and we're left with those stupid Red Box vending machines with their tiny assortment of bad movies.

stay close,

Bob Arnold / Longhouse said...

Me too, Mike.

By the way, you in my seat?!

all's well, Bob

Curtis Faville said...

We belong to Netflix, but their selection is quite limited.

I like the old movies, but either they don't have them at all, or we end up waiting months while they crawl up the queue.

I still prefer videos, because you can stop and start them at will, and you don't get stuck watching previews and ads.

But they're fading fast. Pretty soon they'll be extinct.

Bob Arnold / Longhouse said...

Thank you, Curtis,
another movie lover!